The age gap condrum…er conondrum…er problem.
You know how when you arrive in a new place there are always several people or families that you are naturally drawn to? Maybe they have kids the same age, or are a little extra friendly? There are several families like that here…young couples with kids about the same age as ours.
Then I clued into the fact that those friends call me mother, not older sister. I realized that there was some kind of disconnect there.
The other day, my friend, the mother of two teenagers, told me it was her birthday. After we did the math we figured out that she’s a few months YOUNGER than me. Then I did the age math with another friend of mine (she doesn’t know exactly how old she is). She already has a 4 year old grandkid so I was assuming probably like 45…but remembering how EARLY people get married and how quick they have babies, she’s probably only about 36…since her oldest daughter is turning 20.
I realized that, in reality, I’m a lot closer in age to the MOM’S of the young mothers I was hanging with. It was like when I found my first white hair, or seeing a picture and noticing smile lines for the first time. It aged me quite a bit to realize that that my age peers are grandmas.
So, my peers seem much older, but I try to remember that we’ve lived almost the same amount of life. We can’t yet talk about what its like to have rebellious teenagers, or when our kids were married, or how it feels when your first grandbaby is born. I can’t even wrap my head around all that…I’m still in the baby not sleeping well/kindergartener/chicken pox phase of life.
But, we can talk about what its like to be a wife and a mother. We can talk about how to respect and honor and support our husbands. How to hold our temper with our kids (or grandkids). How to take moments with our kids to TEACH instead of react.